**The Noodle Incident**
*Diary Entry*
“What are you doing?” asked Elaine, watching as her husband tucked a note with his number under the windscreen wiper of the car hed just bumped while reversing.
“Leaving my details so they can call me. I have to make things right.”
“Why? Its pitch blackno one saw us,” she whispered, glancing around. “This isnt even our neighbourhood. Lets just drive off.”
“Thats not how decent people behave. What if someone hit *us* and ran?”
“Look at this car! It probably costs as much as a flat. A dent like that is nothing to them!”
“No, Elaine. I cant walk away.”
They climbed back into their car, and John carefully manoeuvred out of the estate.
“How exactly are you going to pay for repairs? Weve barely got two pennies to rub togethermost of its already going on rent for that new place,” Elaine pressed.
“My new jobs paying well. Ill settle it within a yearwe wont even feel the pinch,” John reassured her, following the satnavs route.
“You havent even started yet, and youre already in debt,” she muttered, staring at unfamiliar houses through the window. “I *told* you this honesty of yours would land us in trouble. Well end up homeless at this rate. You cant be like thiswake up!”
John stayed silent.
Half an hour later, as the sun crept over the rooftops, they arrived at their new rented flat, where the landlord was waiting.
“Just the two of you, correct?” asked the meticulous-looking man in a suit after theyd inspected the place. Sitting at the kitchen table, he began drafting the lease agreement.
“And a cat,” John added. Elaine rolled her eyes.
“A *cat*?” The landlord frowned. “Your wife never mentioned a pet.”
Elaine could have sunk through the floor, mortified.
“I wouldnt have rented to you if Id known,” the man said, setting down his pen. After a tense pause, he sighed. “Fine. You seem decent, and youve come all this way. But the rent goes up by a hundred quid a monthfor wear and tearand well call it even.”
“I dont think” Elaine began, but John cut in.
“Agreed. Sorry for not mentioning it earlier.”
“Right, then. Shake on it,” the landlord said, finishing the paperwork.
***
“Why did you tell him about the cat? I left the bloody thing in the car on purpose!” Elaine snapped once the landlord had gone.
“Lying by omission isnt right,” John protested, unpacking their things.
“Oh, but paying an extra twelve hundred a year *is*?” She flung her clothes onto the bed. “I love that youre honest, but theres got to be a line!”
“At least weve got the flat. Dont worryIll earn it all back with the new job.”
“*If* you get it. With your morals, no regional managers going to hire you. They want smooth talkers who can spin a yarn, not blokes whod pay a coffee machine extra if it overcharged them.”
“You really think I wont get it?” John looked strickenso much so that he missed the table with his mug, sending it smashing onto the tiles, cracking one.
“We could hide it under a rug and say nothing. But youd rather pay for the repair, wouldnt you?” Elaine shot back.
John nodded guiltily.
“You wont get it,” she said flatly.
“What do I do, then?” He slumped onto a stool, defeated.
This job was the whole reason theyd moved. It was supposed to set them uphelp them save for a mortgage, start a family.
“Show them you can be sharp when it counts. Learn to spin a tale now and then. Everyone does it.”
John nodded grimly. He knew people took advantage of his honesty, and success always slipped through his fingers. Maybe it *was* time to change. The interview would be his test.
“Fine. Youre right. Ill do it.”
***
At the interview, John was flawless. His degree and references spoke for themselves. The director nodded approvingly at every answer. The job was as good as his.
“Based on our chat, youre a perfect fit,” the director said, setting aside Johns CV. “Just one last question: Would you go the extra mile for this company, even if it meant bending the truth for profit?”
“Pardon?” John blinked.
“Could you spin a convincing yarn if it meant securing a deal? Even if it wasnt entirely above board?”
The directors stare bore into him. Every instinct screamed *no*, but John remembered Elaines advice and forced a confident smirk.
“Absolutely. No qualms at allwhatever it takes.”
“Youre not what were looking for. Goodbye.”
Johns stomach dropped. “*What?* Why?”
“Our firm values trust. Were not some fly-by-night operation. One shady deal isnt worth ruining our reputation.”
“ButI misunderstood! Id *never* liegive me another chance!”
“So you can spin me another tale? No, thanks. We dont need snakes here.”
Defeated, John left. The world had crumbled in an instant. Hed failed Elaine, failed himself. All hed needed to do was stay true.
***
“Yeah, I got it,” John lied when Elaine called.
*If Im going to spin yarns, might as well commit,* he thought. *Ill pretend to go to work while job-hunting. Maybe somethingll turn up.*
Then his phone rangan unknown number.
“About the car you hit this morning. Lets sort this out.”
Johns stomach twisted. Hed forgotten all about it. There went their savings.
At the address, he spotted the dented car and called the owner.
Five minutes later, the director from his interview stepped out.
*Bloody hell.*
“You again!” The man looked just as stunned. “Whyd you go and dent my wifes bonnet?”
“It was dark, I”
“More tall tales?” The director stepped closer.
“No. Ill pay for it.”
“With what? Youre unemployed.”
“Ill sort it. Thats my problem.”
“Oh, you willthrough payroll deductions.” The director clapped his shoulder.
“*Payroll?*”
“Consider this your second chance. We need honest blokes like you. But one thing puzzles mewhy lie at the interview?”
“Everyone does it. They say its harmless.”
“Only if it helps without hurting others. We *do* use that tactic sometimes.”
“How?”
“Ask me in a year.” The director winked and shook his hand.
The insurance would cover the repairs, but John wouldnt learn that until later.
*Lesson learnt: Honesty paysjust not always how you expect.*
