Forgive me for missing your birthday, Paul. Funny thingI had a bit of an accident.
There I was, leaving a construction site in Manchester, hardly a mile down the road when a little lad darted straight onto my bonnet. Can you believe it? Thankfully, I wasnt speeding. Jumped out, heart in my throat, only to find the boy right as raingrinning up at me like it was a lark. A proper little ginger, no older than six.
“Wheres your mum?” I asked.
“Shes at home,” he said, “cooking supper.”
“Right, lets go have a word with her then,” I said. “Sort this out proper.”
He led me to his block of flats, pointed to the door, then ducked behind me like I was a shield. A woman answeredstriking, really, but with this tired look about her, like shed seen one too many rainy days.
“Apologies for the bother,” I started, “theres been a bit of a mishap. No harm done, thank heavensyour boy and my car had a run-in. Hes unharmed, see?” I nudged the lad forward. “Should we ring the police?”
“Wont be necessary,” she said softly. “Fifth time hes done this.”
“Come again?”
“Oliver, to your room,” she told him sharply, then turned to me. “Kitchen, if you dont mind. Tea? Or would you prefer coffee?”
Her tea was lovely, steeped with a bit of mint.
“Sorry about all this,” said Eleanorthat was her name. “Ollie overheard me telling a friend how tight thingsve been since his dad left. Now the little scamps decided to fetch me a husband by throwing himself at cars. Youre the fifth bloke hes tried it on. Nearly gave two of them heart failure. Ive told him hes all I need, but hes stubborn as his granddadonce hes got an idea, good luck shaking it. Car alright? I can cover the repairs if No? Suit yourself.”
And there I was, watching her, realising Id gone utterly smitten. Sounds mad, Paul, but I knew thenshe was the one. Worn-out dressing gown, no makeup, hair half-up. If I let her slip away, I might as well jump off Blackpool Tower.
“I know this is all a bit daft,” I said, “but maybe you and Ollied let me take you to the pictures? Make up for the scare.”
“No need,” she said. “Hell only get ideas again.”
“Not fond of me, then?”
“Its not that. Its justunder different circumstances But this makes it seem like Im sending my son into traffic to snag a husband. Shameful, really.”
“Aye, and me some opportunistic cad,” I joked. “So here we are, bound for hellfire together. Might as well share the stake, eh?”
Cant recall half what I babbled after that, but next day, I fetched them for *Robin Hood* at the cinema. Then dinner. Thenwell.
Long story short, Paul, thats why Im here. Weddings in June. Need a photographer. Fancy the job? Herelook at this.” Vincent pulled out his phone, showing a snapshot of a laughing redhead with a gap-toothed boy on her lap.
“Trust meCupids no winged cherub. Hes freckled, missing two front teeth, and answers to Oliver. As for the surname? Well, Vincentll do nicely soon enough. No doubt about that.”
