The Clock is Ticking
So what do we do now, doctor? Lucys voice trembled. Years of attempts, tests, and tearsand here they were, facing their last hope, a renowned professor.
What do you do? Live. Or His gaze flicked to her, then to Alex. Find another partner. You, my dear, are nearly forty. The clock is ticking. You can still have a childjust likely not with him.
Professor Steins bluntness was seen as a flaw by colleagues, cruelty by patients. But for Dr. Mark Stein, it was the only form of mercy he knew. Hed watched too many women waste years chasing false hope, left with nothing by forty. He believed in cutting losses, no matter how painful.
You dont believe in miracles, Doctor? Lucy asked. You think we have no chance at all?
Theres always a chance, but I believe in statistics, Stein said flatly. And theyre merciless. Better the bitter truth than a sweet lie that steals your last years. Try new treatments if you must, but the truth is youre both healthy. Unexplained infertility often has psychological roots. You decide what to do with that.
Lucy had been warned about Dr. Steins brutal honesty. But hearing it firsthand was different.
In the car, she and Alex sat in silence.
The words *find another partner* hung between them like poison. Lucy studied Alexher rock through thick and thin. *Leave him? After everything? All the years, the struggles, the tears? For the faint hope of a child with someone else? Its not worth it.*
Maybe this is punishment, Alex broke the quiet. All those years we put money first, never wanting kids
Dont say that. We have each other, Lucy said softly. Honestly, Im tired of trying. I just want to liveus, together. We dont need children to be happy. We were happy before, werent we?
Alex squeezed her hand.
For ten years, theyd been more than husband and wifethey were partners, a team. Theyd shared everything: from their first celebratory sandwich after a big deal to sleepless nights building their business. Kids never fit into the plan; their success was their child. The flat, the car, the country cottageall fruits of their labour.
After seeing Dr. Stein, Lucy let go. They adopted two catssomething theyd always wanted but delayed for the *future baby*. They bought a cosy house in the suburbs and abandoned the desperate quest for parenthood. Fate knew best, they decided.
Then, a year and a half latera miracle. Two pink lines.
Andrew was born. Lucy embraced motherhood perfectly, by the book. Alex threw himself into work, the ideal provider. To outsiders, they were picture-perfect. Their marriage had weathered infertility and been blessed with a late miracle. But even the sturdiest rock crumblesnot from quakes, but from steady, silent erosion.
Lucy was five years older. At twenty-two, Alex had been drawn to her ambition. Their bond was built on mutual respect and shared goalsbut shed always led. Years of failed attempts to conceive had brought them closer yet buried a quiet sorrow. With Andrews arrival, Lucy lost interest in Alex. They became *mum and dad*, not husband and wife.
***
The fateful day was ordinary. A routine clinic visit. A long corridor smelling of antiseptic, filled with crying children. Alex sat with Andrew, lost in thoughtuntil the door opened.
A woman walked in with a six-year-old boy. Not beautiful, but alive with restless energy. Their eyes met. Neither looked away. Just secondsbut enough.
*Dad? Whats wrong?* Andrew tugged his sleeve.
Alex startled. Nothing, son.
He stood, walked to the water fountain. Their eyes met again. Alex spokejust a few words. A lightning strike. A quiet, devastating spark that burned away his past.
Her name was Olivia. They talked for an hour in that waiting room, sharing everythingtheir stifling marriages, the feeling life was passing them by, the quiet despair theyd carried for years. It wasnt just attraction. It was recognition. A flash of lightning revealing the lie their lives had been.
Two weeks later, Alex came home late. Lucy waited with dinner as usual.
*Alex, we missed you*
He walked in still wearing his coat, face gaunt yet strangely radiant.
Lucy, we need to talk.
Her stomach dropped. Whats wrong? Are you okay?
Ive met someone, he exhaled, unable to meet her eyes. And Ive realised our whole life was a lie. A beautiful, convenient lie.
Lucy staggered. The room spun.
*Whatwhat are you saying? Someone else? Alex, wake up! We have a family! A son!*
I havent *lived* in years! His voice cracked, raw with bottled-up despair. I functioned. Played the perfect husband, the perfect fatherbut I wasnt alive. Now now I can *breathe*.
*And what about me?* she whispered, tears streaming. *Our love? Our years together? Andrew? Was none of it real? You said you loved me!*
I thought it was love, Alex said tiredly. Turns out it was habit. Duty. I cant pretend anymore. Im sorry. Ill still see Andrew.
He turned and left, the door slamming behind him. Lucy sat frozen at the table, the cooling meal before her, the kitchen clock ticking loudly.
*The clock is ticking, love* Like an echo from the past.
***
He was gone. Left everythinghome, family, his old life. Moved to Edinburgh with Olivia and her son, leaving Lucy with a broken heart and a five-year-old who didnt understand why Daddy wouldnt tuck him in anymore.
The first months were hell. Lucy went through the motionsfeeding Andrew, putting him to bedthen cried into her pillow at night, wondering where her perfect life had cracked. Anger, grief, self-pityall tangled together.
But one evening, tucking Andrew in, she didnt say *Daddys working.* Instead, honestly: *Daddys going to live somewhere else. But he loves you.* Saying it aloud, she began to believe it too. Time to grow up.
Lucy cut her hair, went blonde, dug out her old degree, and enrolled in refresher courses. The world, which had shrunk to playgrounds and playdates, began expanding again.
At those courses, she ran into Stevenan old schoolmate. The one shed passed silly notes with years ago. His marriage had ended; his daughter lived with her mum. They started meetingno grand gestures, just coffee, walks, reminiscing. And Lucy realised she could just *be*tired, imperfect, no longer playing the *happy wife*.
***
Their wedding was quietno white dress, no fancy venue. Just a registry office, then a countryside trip with Andrew.
Steven never tried to replace Andrews father. He was just therehelping with homework, fixing bikes, taking him fishing. No drama, no pressure. Slowly, Lucys heart healed.
At forty-three, when she found out she was pregnant, she feared telling Stevenbraced for more *clock is ticking* comments. But he just held her and whispered, *Well manage. Together.*
The birth was hard. The midwife, an older woman with kind eyes, smiled as she placed a healthy girl in Lucys arms.
*Second baby after forty? Youre brave.*
*Not brave,* Lucy murmured, exhausted but smiling. *Just with a different man.*
***
Three years later, dropping her daughter at nursery, Lucy bumped into Alex. He smiled awkwardly.
*Hello. You look wonderful. Heard lifes been good to you.*
*Yes, it has,* she said simply. *Truly.*
That evening, on impulse, she looked up the clinicand Dr. Mark Stein. Still practising. A legend.
She walked into his office. He hadnt changed much.
*Doctor, you wont remember me. Years ago, you told me to leave my husband if I wanted a child.*
He frowned, bracing for anger.
*I came to thank you,* Lucy said, her smile free of bitterness. *Your honesty shattered my world back then. I didnt listenbut life found its own way. Not the straight path you predicted, but thank you.*
Stein nodded silently. After she left, he stared out the window. Of course he didnt remember her. After forty years, thousands of couples blurred together.
Outside, Lucy took her daughters hand. The little girl chattered away as they walked. For the first time in years, the thought of *the ticking clock* brought no dreadjust quiet gratitude for both her lives. The one with Alex. The one shed built with Steven. Both had shaped her. Both were necessary.
