Emily, Ive changed my mind. My expartner proposed againhes got a brighter future, the bride announced on her wedding day.
Kevin, we need to talk, Emily stood in the doorway of the grooms suite, radiant in her ivory gown but with a strange, resolute look in her eyes.
Kevin lifted his head in surprise. He had just finished knotting his bow tie and was about to step out. The ceremony was only thirty minutes away.
Emily, you cantseeing the groom before the ceremony is a bad omen, he said with a nervous grin. Superstitions, love.
What superstitions now Emily stepped forward, shutting the door firmly behind her. The love that always shone in her eyes was replaced by something cold and foreign. I have something to tell you.
Kevin felt a hollow snap inside. Hed known Emily for four years, learning every inflection, every glance. Hed never seen that tone, that expression.
Whats happened? he asked, though his gut already screamed that nothing good would follow.
Emily inhaled deeply, as if bracing for icy water.
Ive decided not to marry you, she said evenly. My former boyfriend has proposed again. Hes more promising.
Kevin stared, stunned, unable to believe his ears. Outside the hotel, June sunlight gleamed over Londons streets. Down below, guests milled, bridesmaids laughed, music swelled. In that small room, his world collapsed.
Youre joking? he managed.
No. Im sorry, she lowered her gaze. I know this is terrible timing, but its better now than living with regret forever.
Regret? anger surged in Kevin. You were going to suffer with me? All these four years what was that? Waiting for something better?
Emily winced as if in pain.
Dont simplify it. Things were good with you, truly. But Oliver hes always been special to me. You knew that from the start.
Kevin remembered. Theyd met at a mutual friends birthday party; Emily had just broken up with Oliver Hart, a successful restaurateur who owned a chain of eateries. Their twoyear romance ended abruptly when Oliver left for New York to expand his business, leaving Emily heartbroken.
Kevin had patiently gathered the pieces of her shattered heart, month after month, never rushing, never pressuring. Hed simply been theresteady, understanding, loving. Eventually, Emily seemed to return his feelings, or so he thought.
Did he come back? Kevin asked, trying to steady himself. When?
A month ago, Emily replied softly. He called while you were away on a work trip to Manchester.
And you decided just like that? In a month?
It wasnt simple, she lifted her eyes, resolve flashing. I fought with myself. But when he proposed Kevin, you have to understand. Hes launching a restaurant holding across Europe. Ill have my own cosmetics line. Its a completely different life.
Kevin watched the woman hed called the love of his life just that morning. Emily, beautiful, ambitious, had been a manager at a salon, dreaming of her own business. Hed supported her, though he was just an ordinary engineer with a decent but unremarkable salary.
What about our plans? he asked. The house we talked about? Children?
I have other plans now, Emily stepped back toward the door. I need to go. Oliver is waiting downstairs.
Here? Hes here on our wedding day?
I asked him to come, Emily grasped the door handle. I didnt want to be alone after this conversation.
What about the guests? My mother travelled from Birmingham just to see us?
Ill explain to everyone, she cut in. Ill say its my fault, a sudden decision.
Its sudden, alright! Kevin raised his voice. Yesterday you said you loved me! This morning you kissed me and promised happiness!
I was wrong, Emily lowered her head. Im sorry it turned out like this.
She slipped out, the door closing softly behind her.
Kevin stood in the middle of the room, stunned, crushed, unable to comprehend. The clock on the wall read fifteen minutes to the ceremony. Downstairs, guests waited, music played, the celebration that would never happen was already set.
He sank onto the bed, loosening his bow tie. Thoughts whirledwhy? How could she? What now? How could he face the crowd?
The door opened again, this time without a knock. Ian, his best man and longtime friend, stepped in.
Kevin, whats happening? Ian looked bewildered. Emily just walked through the hall in her wedding dress, crying. She got into a black Mercedes with a man and left. What the
Shes not marrying me, Kevin said dryly. Her ex is back, promising more.
Ian opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again.
Bloody hell on your wedding day? he finally managed. Seriously?
More than seriously, Kevin stood, pacing. We have to tell the guests. Cancel everything.
Ill help, Ian placed a hand on his shoulder. How are you holding up?
I dont know, Kevin admitted. I feel like Im in a nightmare.
Going to the reception hall felt like the hardest trial of his life. Announcing the cancellation, enduring sympathetic glances, whispered gossip, questioning looks. Emilys parents looked as shocked as he didshed kept them in the dark. His own mother, whod driven from Coventry, wept, repeating, How could this happen, love?
When the night finally emptied and the untouched banquet lay in silence, Kevin sat alone in the suite, his phone buzzing with calls and messagesfriends, colleagues, relatives. He answered none.
Ian, have a whisky, his friend offered, sliding a glass across. Itll take the edge off.
Kevin took a sip; the burn didnt soothe the ache.
You know whats worst? he said after a long pause. I always felt she never truly belonged to me. That somewhere deep down she still carried Olivers shadow. I kept hoping it would fade.
First loves stick, you know, Ian replied, settling opposite. But to dump you on the wedding day thats beyond the pale.
She was always attracted to grand gestures, Kevin said bitterly. Remember how we met?
At Sophies birthday, Ian nodded. She was in a black dress, looking mournful over a past relationship.
And I walked over and said
Perhaps black isnt your colour? Ian finished, chuckling. I gave her a daisy from the pot. She smiled for the first time that evening and said life felt like it was moving forward.
And now shes left me for the same man she once mourned, Ian shook his head. Lifes a cruel joker.
The night passed without sleep. Kevin lay staring at the ceiling, replaying four yearsjoys, fights, reconciliations, future plans. Was it all a lie? Or did she truly love him until Oliver reappeared?
Morning found him back in the flat theyd shared, packing his things. The door opened with his key, and emptiness hit him. Emilys favorite ornaments were gone, photos removed, her cosmetics vanished from the bathroom.
On the table lay an envelope. Inside, a note and the flats spare key.
Kevin, Im sorry for everything. Youre a good man and deserve happiness. I have to go my own way. Ill collect my things later. E
Brief, dry, no remorsefour years erased with a single slip of paper.
Kevin sank onto the sofa theyd once chosen together after a long debate over colour. Emily had insisted on beige for practicality; hed wanted navy, more lively.
A navy sofa is for a bachelor, shed said. Were a family now, I replied, he remembered, the words now tasting bitter.
Family a word that now burned his mind.
He gathered his belongings and moved in with Ian, who offered a spare room while things settled. He took a few days off work; his boss, hearing the story, granted him leave. The numbness lingered, untouched by friends or family.
A week later, Sophiehis university friendcalled.
Kevin, can we meet? I need to talk, she said, tension in her voice.
They met in a small café near Ians flat. Sophie looked both embarrassed and determined.
Ive known Emily since university, she began. I hate to bring this up, but you should hear what I overheard.
The ex and Emily? Kevin managed a dry smile. No thanks, I dont need details.
Its not about them. Its about you, Sophie pressed. I accidentally heard a conversation between Emily and Oliver before the wedding. They were talking about you.
What did they say? Kevin asked, his curiosity sharp.
Oliver asked why she agreed to marry you. She replied, Youre reliable, safe, predictable. Its comfortable, but boring. Sophie paused. Oliver then said, A stone wall is solid, but living against it feels like being locked in.
Kevin felt something tighten. Boring. Predictable. The word struck harder than any betrayal.
Why tell me this? he asked.
Because it isnt true, Kevin, Sophie said, meeting his gaze. Youre not boring. Youre deep, funny, thoughtful. With Emily, you just dimmed. You became a shadow, afraid to step out of line, fearing youd scare her off.
He remembered the countless times hed yielded in arguments, rearranged his schedule for her, turned down a hiking trip because she feared for him, stopped seeing friends she didnt like.
Why didnt you say this earlier? he whispered.
Would you have listened? Sophie shook her head. You idolised her, saw her as a goddess. You gave her everything, but she wanted fireworks, not a steady flame. Oliver was that fireworksbright, loud, spectacular, then quickly gone.
After their talk, Kevin felt a shift. He returned to work, found a new flat, started running each morninga habit hed abandoned because Emily disliked early rises.
Gradually the pain dulled. Some nights he still woke with a hollow feeling, still caught thinking, I should have told Emily but life moved on.
Three months later, he spotted Emily in a department store, gazing at rings in a jewellery window. She was still striking, confident, radiant.
Hello, he said, approaching.
Emily flinched, turned, surprise, embarrassment flickering across her face.
Kevin hi, she managed a tight smile. How are you?
Better than three months ago, he replied honestly. Youre still looking at rings?
She blushed, looking away. Yes, Oliver and I are getting married next month.
Congratulations, he said, surprisingly sincere. I hope it all goes through this time.
Kevin, she swallowed. I know it hurts. Im truly sorry
No need, he raised a hand, stopping her. Everythings been said. I just wanted to thank you.
For what? she asked, genuinely puzzled.
For leaving, he said simply. If you hadnt, Id still be living someone elses life, losing myself.
She frowned. I dont understand.
Its fine, he smiled. Goodbye, Emily. Be happy.
He walked away feeling an unexpected lightness, as if a massive weight had finally been lifted.
Later that evening his phone rang. The display read Emily.
Yes? Kevin answered, curiosity replacing anger.
Kevin, can we talk? her voice wavered, unsteady.
We already talked today, he reminded.
No, seriously. I cant stop thinking about what you said about living a borrowed life, about losing myself.
Whats there to think about? he shrugged, though she could not see him. I meant exactly what I said.
Were you unhappy with me? her tone hinted at hurt.
No, he answered honestly. I was happy, but it was a happiness built on giving up parts of myselfmy desires, my principles. I molded myself to fit your expectations, became smaller, quieter, more convenient.
Silence lingered, then she whispered, Did I lose myself with you?
I dont think so, he chuckled. You always knew what you wanted and chased it.
Another pause. Kevin, maybe I was wrong. Maybe I shouldnt have?
Stop, he cut in. Dont. You made the choice you believed was right. I accept it. Theres no turning back.
Why? her voice trembled with tears. If we both made a mistake
Because I no longer want to be the spare tyre, the comfortable option. I dont want to sit and wonder if youll look elsewhere for something brighter, more prospective.
Youve changed, she observed after a beat.
Yes, he agreed. And thats perhaps the only positive outcome of our story. Thank you for the call, Emily, but please, dont call again.
He hung up, inhaled deeply. A strange mix of sorrow and relief filled him. One chapter closed; another lay ahead, and he would write it himself.
Six months later, on a snowy December afternoon, Kevin stood on the viewing platform of a ski resort in the Lake District. He had finally fulfilled his longheld dreamlearning to ski. The sun glittered on the powdery slope below, and he felt utterly content.
Beautiful, isnt it? a voice called from beside him.
He turned to see a woman in a bright blue ski jacket, her brown eyes sparkling with gold flecks.
Absolutely, he replied, smiling. First time here?
Its my third, she said, taking off a glove and extending her hand. Anna.
Kevin, he shook it. So youre a pro?
More a stubborn enthusiast, she laughed. I fall a lot, but I always get back up. And you?
A beginner, finally living a dream, he said, eyes on the slope where skiers zigzagged. You know, there are things we keep postponing, thinking someday. Then you realise, if not now, maybe never.
A philosopher, she teased, tilting her head. I like people who can think about life.
And I like people who can fall and rise again, he replied. Want to tackle this run together? I promise an elegant tumble.
Deal, Anna giggled, her laughter echoing off the snowcapped hills. First one to the lodge buys mulled wine!
She shot down the hill, and he followed, his heart swelling with pure, unblemished joy. For the first time in ages he felt completely, undeniably himself. And that feeling was worth every loss and disappointment hed endured.
Sometimes you must lose something precious to discover something pricelessyour own self.
