Too late
Laura Whitaker steps out of the obstetricians clinic baffled. She unfolds the test sheet and reads it again: Pregnancy78weeks. How could this happen? How did I not notice anything? she wonders as she heads to her car. Did I forget a pill? What nowshould I have a baby? Im fortythree, and this?
She drives home lost in thought. At a traffic light she barely registers that the cars have started moving; she snaps back only when the driver behind her horns loudly.
Inside her flat, Laura throws herself into chores to keep her mind off the unsettling news. After lunch her sisterinlaw, Natalie, pops in for a quick visit.
Mom, Ive got a surprise for you! Natalie beams, taking a seat at the kitchen table.
Come on, spill it, Laura says, eyes bright with curiosity.
Natalie, Sam proposed to me! her daughter announces, grinning from ear to ear. And I said yes!
Congratulations, my girl! Laura says, tears welling as she embraces Natalie. She likes Sam smart, driven, steady, modestly ambitious, wellmannered and cultured. At twentyfive he earns a decent wage and has been independent from his parents for years. He and Natalie have been together for almost three years, and Laura has repeatedly seen his genuine commitment.
Darling, whens the wedding? Laura asks while pouring steaming tea into mugs.
Not sure yet, Natalie shrugs. We havent talked about it. Probably next summer.
Are you telling your dad? Laura presses, watching her daughter closely.
I dont know, Natalie frowns. Honestly, I dont even want to
Dont do that, love, Laura scolds gently. Hes your father, he loves you. I know youre hurt, but people part ways; it doesnt mean you have to cut him out. I forgave him, and you should, too. Dont hold a grudge. Invite him to the wedding, please.
Mom, how can you say that? Natalie snaps. He left you for someone else, and you forgave him! Hes been cheating with his secretary for a year! How could you ever forgive that?
Sweetheart, Simon and I were together for twentytwo years. We raised yousmart, beautiful. Those were happy years, and Im grateful to him for that. But he fell in love with another woman. You cant force a heart, you know, Laura tries to explain. What was I supposed to do? Throw a tantrum, smash dishes, hold a grudge forever? Hate him until I die? Because his feelings cooled? Its nonsense, Natalie. Dont you get it?
No, Mum, I dont, Natalie shakes her head. If Sam treated me like that, Id I dont even know what Id do!
Laura stops arguing; Natalies fiery nature will never see eye to eye with her. In youth, things are felt so differently.
After seeing Natalie off, Laura returns to the kitchen, washes the dishes, and pulls a joint of beef from the freezer for dinner. She keeps replaying the surprise pregnancy, wondering what to do. Giving birth at her age, alone, is frightening, yet the thought of being a mother again, caring for a child, fills her with a yearning she cant ignore.
She fetches an old photo album from a high shelf, leafing through pictures of Natalie as a baby in a onesie, smiling wide in her grandmothers arms. Later, Natalie in a dress at the city park gate, the day she fell from a swing and needed stitches on a knee that still bears a faint scar. A school photo of Natalie in first grade with a bouquet, next to her father Simon looking solemn. A teenage Natalie in a snowball play, wearing a sparkling silver dress Laura sewed herself after three sleepless nights at the sewing machine. A family shot on a sunny Thai beachLaura, Simon, and teenage Natalie, all tanned and laughing.
Laura feels a pang of melancholy. She once believed her family was the strongest, most united thing around. She and Simon used to share dreams, plans, a life. Years passed, Natalie grew, bringing pride. Simons career climbed; they bought a house, a car, traveled. Laura opened a bridaldress boutique, fulfilling a lifelong ambition. Yet one thing remained missing: after Natalie, Laura never carried another child to term. A miscarriage ended a sevenweek pregnancy; a later one reached fourteen weeks before a fatal diagnosis forced termination. She spent a night crying in a hospital ward, then decided she would never try again.
Looking back, Laura sees the irony: once she had youth, a loving husband, stability, and a burning desire for another baby. Now, with none of that left, fate hands her an unexpected pregnancy as a cruel joke.
When Simon announced he was leaving, Laura wasnt shocked. Shed suspected he had a lover, but he denied it, calling her imagination overactive. She launched a frantic campaign to win him back, refusing therapy, trying everything from heartfelt talks to a homestriptease. Nothing worked. A month ago Simon packed his things, filed for divorce, and left. Their final, painful conversation left Laura reeling. She never understood what he saw in his new secretary, Olgaa young woman with silicone lips, long false lashes, and a plunging neckline. Laura begged Simon to replace her, but he brushed her off: Lara, I dont care what she looks like. Shes efficient, smart. We cant afford to look for someone new now. Laura sensed Olga wasnt as invaluable as Simon claimed; later, her suspicions proved right. Simons betrayal shattered years of building.
Simon left Laura a twobedroom flat in Manchester; he moved with Olga to a country house. The thought of a stranger living where they once shared happy memories infuriated Laura, though shed agreed to stay in the city for work and because Natalie and Sam rented nearby. The gnawing discomfort lingered despite her attempts to ignore it.
The next day, a weekend, Laura visits her longtime friend Claire, who shes known since their children were in the same nursery. Claire greets her with a bottle of whisky.
Lets have a halfpint each, love. Ive cooked some steakperfect with a splash of whisky! Claire winks, pulling glasses from the cabinet.
Thanks, Claire, but Ill pass. I cant, Laura says.
Why not? Some tablets, perhaps? Claire asks.
No, Im pregnant, Claire, Laura replies, halfsmiling.
Claire sits, shocked. Wait, you and Simon split, right? Or have you already found a lover?
No, no lover. This child is Simons, from a night two months agocandles, wine, lace He couldnt resist, Laura says, placing her hands on her belly.
Good grief, dear! What are you thinking of doing? Claire asks.
I dont know, Laura sighs. I just found out yesterday. I have no idea what to do.
Honestly, youre a bit old for giving birth now. Raising a child alone at fiftyplus, with health not what it used to be, is tough. Maybe you should think about maintenance payments. Your daughters getting married soongrandchildren might be on the way. Thats my honest take, but the choice is yours.
Probably right, its late, Laura muses, hearing some of her own doubts echoed.
She says goodbye to Claire and drives to Natalies flat.
Mum, hi! Come in. Want a coffee? Natalie chirps.
No, love, Im not in the mood. I need to talk. Is Sam home? Laura asks, hoping for privacy.
Hes at his parents, helping with a renovation, Natalie replies.
Laura, nervous, tells her about the pregnancy.
Mum, do you actually want this baby? Natalie asks.
Very much, but Im scared, Laura admits quietly.
What does the doctor say?
He says everything looks fine, the baby is developing normally. In my twenties I lost two children and never got a clear cause. Maybe the doctors werent great. Now Im terrified of going through that again. Im over forty; they say its risky, and the baby could have problems. Ive read horror stories online. Im not sure Im ready. My head is spinning with doubts, Laura confesses.
Listen, Mum, Natalie urges, you need thorough checkups. Your health comes first. Go to reputable specialists, not just the internet. Nowadays many women have healthy babies after forty. If youre fit, why not?
I get it, Laura nods. Maybe its worth a try.
The decision is yours alone, but know well support you whatever you choose. Will you tell your father? Natalie asks.
No, I dont think so, Laura says.
The talk steadies Laura a bit. Medical tests reveal no serious health issues, and she decides to keep the baby. She muses, Should I tell Simon? He doesnt need to know; hes not part of my life anymore, and the child wont be his either. Shes only met him a couple of times since the split, when he collected a few belongings. Six months pass without contact, until one day Simon appears at her boutique.
Laura, Im here because I cant find the house papers. They must be with you. I called, you didnt answer. I went to the flat, couldnt get in. Did you change the locks? he asks, avoiding her swelling belly.
Yes, I did, she replies evenly. What did you expect, wandering into my home whenever you feel like it? We settled this ages ago. I have no documents.
You havent wasted any time, have you? Married again? he smirks.
No, Simon, Im not married and I wont be. My life isnt your concern. I have work, no time for chatter, Laura cuts him off.
Simon mutters something as he leaves. He returns to his office, the image of his former wife lingering. I wonder how far along she is. Could she have found someone else already? Shes always been strong, he thinks.
Just then Olga breezes into his office, swaying her hips.
Darling, Im starving. Lets go out for dinner! she coos, perching on the edge of the desk.
Later, Olga, Im busy, Simon replies, eyes halfglazed on his screen.
No, I need you now! Cant you postpone work for me? she huffs.
Go on alone if you must, he says curtly. Olga huffs out, and Simon resumes work, his mind far from spreadsheets.
From the maternity ward, Laura is greeted by Natalie, Sam, Claire, and several of the seamstresses from her boutique. Sam gently cradles the newborn swaddled in a soft blue blanket.
Good heavens, hes tiny! Im scared to hold him, Sam whispers, rocking the infant.
Hes gorgeous, just a little bundle of joy, Natalie coos, beaming at her little brother. He looks just like me, right, Mum?
Exactly like you, Laura laughs.
Back home, Laura gasps at the sight of a freshly decorated nursery: rainbow garlands, balloons, and a big banner over the crib that reads Happy Birthday, David! (the name Laura chose for her son). The room feels warm and new.
David is born healthy, and Laura feels wonderfully well. Days fly by caring for the baby. Natalie often stops by, watching David or taking him for a walk in the nearby park, giving Laura a breather.
Well, Natalie, consider this a rehearsal for motherhood! Laura jokes, watching her daughter handle her brother like a pro. One day youll have your own kids, and you already know the ropes.
I love it! Natalie grins, eyes flicking to Sam.
A few months later, the doorbell rings. Simon stands on the doorstep with a bouquet.
Hello, Laura, he says, extending the flowers, which she doesnt take.
Simon, what brings you here? Laura asks coolly, arms crossed.
I know everything nowDavid is my son. Nicky, your friend, told me, he says.
Even if thats true, does it matter now? Laura replies.
Laura, Im sorry. I was a fool. I see the mistake I made. I want to be part of our childs life. Will you let me back? Simon begs, eyes pleading.
Laura looks at him, remembering how a year ago she would have given anything for those words. Now they mean nothing. No, Simon. Its too late for you to change. Dont come back, she says, stepping back and slamming the door, locking it.
Let me see my son! Simon shouts, pounding on the door.
He returns a few more times, trying to corner her in the garden while she pushes the pram. He begs for forgiveness, for a life together again. Laura remains unmoved. At Natalie and Sams wedding, Simon appears briefly, hands them a generous gift, then leaves. Later Laura learns from mutual acquaintances that Simon married Olga, but that marriage lasted only a few months before she left him for someone else.
The story continues, but Laura walks forward, holding David, knowing she has finally found a purpose that no one can take away.
