**A Bad Mother**
*”Youre a right disgrace, thats what you are!”* Her mother-in-laws voice crackled down the line, raw with fury. *”Dumping your daughter and that baby on me like stray kittens! And you call yourself a mother…”*
Emily clenched her jaw. Shed barely slept four hours a night all week, taken extra shifts, shouldered the sudden weight of her fractured familyand now she had to justify herself?
*”Margaret, my chick is a grown woman. She waved that in my face often enough. Let her figure it out now. I gave her adviceif she wont listen, thats on her.”*
She hung up. No point arguing. To her family, she was the villain now. No strength left to endure their lectures.
It hadnt always been this way. Once, Emily had been alone too. Her mother died when she was eighteen; her husband followed a year later, leaving only a baby girl in her arms.
*”Hang in there. Im here. Call if you need anything,”* Margaret had said back then.
But calls were all she ever offered.
*”Emily, love, Id help if I could, but Im exhaustedworks been brutal,”* shed sigh whenever Emily begged her to babysit, even for an afternoon.
Money? Never. None of them lifted a finger, not really. Pity came cheapsympathy, even cheaper.
Emily had clawed her way through alone. Some nights, shed howled at the moon, raw with exhaustion. But shed survived. No one knew better than her what it meant to be a single mother.
So when her daughter Lily brought home a boy at sixteen, Emilys stomach twisted. James had a reputationtroublemaker, ran with a rough crowd. Rumour had it hed already dabbled in things the law forbade.
She tried to warn Lily. *”There are better boys out there.”*
But Lily wouldnt hear it.
*”You dont understand! I love him!”* shed shriek, tears streaming, even when Emily spoke calmly.
Emily couldnt fathom it. Jamess idea of romance was plastic roses on Mothers Day and the occasional reckless ride on his motorbike. One such joyride stretched hoursLily ignored every call. She stumbled in past midnight.
Emily, of course, had been waiting. The row that followed shook the walls.
*”Have you lost your mind?! I nearly called the police! One more stunt like this, and Ill have words with himand you. Hand over your keys. Youre grounded.”*
Lily didnt even flinch.
*”No! You cant lock me up! Im an adultIll go where I want. Try stopping me, and Ill report you.”*
Emilys blood ran cold at the sheer gall. But she kept her voice steady.
*”Youll be an adult at eighteen. Until then, Im responsible for you.”*
That day, Emily realised: Lily knew her rights inside outbut obligations? Not a word. She craved independence, as long as someone else footed the bill.
*”Youre a horrible mother!”* Lily spat during another screaming match.
*”Yes. Horrible. A good mother wouldnt have raised a daughter like you,”* Emily thought bitterly. Somewhere, shed failed. But how could it be otherwise, working two jobs just to keep a roof over their heads?
When Lily announced her pregnancy, Emilys hair turned greyer overnight. The girl had just started university. This wasnt part of the plan.
*”Mum… Im pregnant.”*
Something inside Emily plummeted, heavy as a stone down a well. She didnt screamthough she wanted to. Just breathed deep, sat down, and spoke softly.
*”What do you plan to do?”*
*”Keep it, obviously. What else?”*
*”How will you live? James has never worked a day in his life. You wont manage alone.”*
*”Hes got a job nowwarehouse work, two months in. Were serious.”*
Emily saw it then: Lily was lost in some rosy fantasy. One that would shatter the moment reality hitnappies, night feeds, bills.
*”Lily… Neither of you has skills, experience, prospects. Have you even held a newborn? Babies need time and moneyyouve got neither.”*
Lilys face darkened. Emily raised a hand before the protests could start.
*”Im not your enemy. I want to help. But I know what its like, raising a child so young.”*
*”You were alone though…”*
*”You will be too,”* Emily almost said. She bit it back.
*”I was. Remember why? Because lifes fragile. One day, I had a husbandthe next, he was gone. At thirty, I couldve coped. At twenty? It nearly broke me.”*
For a moment, Lily wavered. Defiance flickered into doubt.
*”So what do I do?”*
*”Ill give you money. See a doctor. If you want, Ill come. Then focus on your degree. If you and James last till graduationfine, build your life. If not? Therell be others. Well get through this.”*
Lily nodded, took the cash. Emily almost relaxedmaybe shed see sense.
But by the fourth month, Lilys belly swelled. Time had run out.
*”What have you done?!”* Emily clutched her head.
*”My life, my choice!”* Lily snapped.
*”At seventeen, its my responsibility too!”*
*”Ill be eighteen when its born. Not your problem,”* Lily said coolly.
Emily already knew: the weight would fall on her. Arguing was pointlesslike stepping into a trap, knowing it would snap shut.
James, predictably, quit his job soon after.
*”Too hard. Not for me,”* he said, loafing at his parents instead.
Their reaction was ice.
*”Your mess. Sort it yourselves,”* his mother said.
And she was right.
The “problem” grew daily. Lily had no plan. James made no promises, and Emily refused to house them. Not that he seemed eager to move in.
He appeared at the hospital, posed for photos as the proud dad, visited twicethen vanished. Emily juggled night feeds, nappies, workred-eyed and wreckedwhile Lily whined: *”Im tired. Youre better at it. He cries when I hold him.”*
It was her past repeating. And Emily knew: she couldnt carry this cross again.
She begged Lily to file for child support. Lily refused. *”Well work it out.”*
Why lift a finger when Mum would do it?
The final straw came the day Lily vanishedno warning, just left the baby with Emily while she went clubbing.
*”You were home anyway. Whats the harm?”* she said when Emily finally reached her.
That was it. When Lily returned, Emily gave her a week to move out.
*”Youd throw your own grandchild onto the streets?”* Lily sobbed.
*”I want peace. You said it wasnt my businessyou were right. Ive done all I can. Now its your turn.”*
Lily left the next day. But peace didnt follow. She spun tales to relativesMargaret first, then others. Emily was painted as a monster. Few offered to take Lily in, but all judged.
Emily carried the silence a year before cracking, confessing to her friend Sarah.
*”Harsh? Maybe. But fair. Youve done your time. If youd caved, shed have dumped a second baby on you. Now? She either swims or sinks. But its her lifenot yours.”*
*Her life.* The words cut deeper than any accusation. Once, Lily had screamed that it was her life, her choiceand it had hurt. Now, it brought relief.
Bitter, but freeing. Emily couldnt live it for her. Maybe Lily would make amends someday. Maybe not. But choices have consequencesand they werent hers to bear anymore.
