Dear Diary,
Tonight the doorbell rang with a harsh, sober clang announcing a visitor. I slipped off my apron, wiped my hands, and went to answer. Standing on the step were my daughter Lily and her young man. I ushered them inside.
Hey, Mum, Lily planted a quick kiss on my cheek. This is Victor, hell be staying with us.
Nice to meet you, Victor said, giving a polite nod.
and this is my aunt, Lucy, Lily added, and I corrected her, Lucy Middleton, not Aunt.
Whats for dinner? I asked, trying to sound casual.
Pea purée and sausage, Lily replied.
Victor grimaced. I dont eat pea purée, he said, slipping off his shoes and heading to the living room.
Mom, Victor doesnt like peas, Lily whined, eyes wide.
Victor dumped his backpack onto the sofa and plonked down. This is actually my room, I said, trying to keep the peace.
Victor, come, Ill show you where youll be sleeping, Lily called, tugging at his sleeve.
Im fine here, he muttered, getting to his feet.
Darling, think of something to feed Victor, I told Lily.
I dont even know. Weve only got half a packet of sausages left, Lucy shrugged.
Thatll domustard, ketchup, and some bread, Victor answered.
Alright then, I muttered, heading for the kitchen. Id spent years rescuing stray kittens and puppies, and now here I was, feeding a new houseguest.
I ladled out some boiled peas, threw two fried sausages onto a plate, nudged a bowl of salad over, and sat down to eat with gusto.
Mom, why are you eating alone? Lily asked as she entered the kitchen.
Because Ive just come home from work and Im starving, I replied, chewing a sausage. Anyone who wants a bite can help themselves or cook something. By the way, why is Victor moving in with us?
Its simplehes my husband. I felt the words catch in my throat.
My husband? Lily echoed, stunned.
Yes, thats it. Youre an adult now, you decide whether to marry or not. Im already nineteen years old, Victor added matteroffactly.
You didnt even invite us to a wedding, Lily huffed.
There was no ceremony; we just signed the papers. Now were husband and wife, so well live together, I said, glancing at Lilys annoyed face.
Congratulations then, Victor said. Why no wedding?
If you have money for a wedding, you could hand it over and well find a use for it, Lily replied.
Got it, I said, still chewing. Why this place?
Because weve got a onebedroom flat and four of us would be cramped, Victor explained.
So you didnt consider renting elsewhere? Lily asked.
Whats the point of renting when my room is free? she replied, surprised.
Right, I said. So, will you both have something to eat?
Lily, theres a pot of pea mash on the stove and sausages in the pan. If thats not enough, theres half a packet left in the fridge. Help yourselves.
Mum, youve got a new soninlaw now, Lily remarked, emphasizing the last word.
And what? I have to break into a jig for this? I snapped. Im exhausted after work, no need for any ceremonial dancing. Use your own hands and feet.
Thats why youre still single! Lily snapped back, slamming the door to her room.
I finished my dinner, washed the dishes, cleared the table and retreated to my bedroom. I changed, grabbed my gym bag and headed to the fitness centre. Im a freespirited woman and I spend several evenings a week at the gym and the pool.
Around ten I returned home, hoping for a hot cup of tea, only to find the kitchen in disarray as if someone had attempted to cook and failed miserably. The lid of the pea pot was missing, the mash had dried and cracked, the sausage packet lay open on the counter, and a stale loaf sat without its wrapper. The frying pan was scorched, its nonstick coating scraped with a fork. Dishes piled in the sink, a sticky sweet puddle glistened on the floor, and the air reeked of cigarettes.
Well, thats a new one, I thought. Lily never let anything like this happen.
I knocked on Lilys door. The young couple inside were sipping wine and smoking.
Lily, clean up the kitchen, will you? Youll need a new pan tomorrow, I said, retreating to my room without closing the door.
Lily leapt up and chased after me.
Why should we clean? And how am I supposed to buy a new pan? Im not working, Im a student. Do you even care about the dishes?
Lily, you know the house rules: eatclean, make a messclean, break somethingreplace it. Everyone looks after their own mess. And yes, the pan isnt cheap; its now ruined beyond repair, I replied calmly.
You dont want us here, Lily snapped.
No, I answered evenly.
I didnt want to argue with Lily; she had never caused trouble before.
But I have a stake in this, she claimed.
No, I said. The flat is mine, all of it. I paid for it, I own it. Youre only on the lease. Dont expect me to solve your problems. If you want to stay, follow the rules.
Ive lived my whole life by your rules. Im married now, and you have no right to tell me what to do, Lily shrieked. Besides, youre old enough to give us the flat.
Ill give you the hallway and a bench on the stairs if you like. So youre married? You never asked me. Youll be sleeping here alone or with your husband elsewhere. Hes not moving in, I said firmly.
Fine, youre stuck with your flat. Victor, were leaving, Lily announced, grabbing her things.
Within minutes Victor stumbled into the flat, a little tipsy.
Alright, Mum, dont panic and everything will be fine, he slurred. Lily and I arent going anywhere tonight. If you behave, maybe well even get a bit cosy later.
What am I to you, Mum? I snapped. Your parents are still at home, so keep your distance and dont forget your brandnew wife.
He lunged, raising his fist. I clamped my manicured fingers around his hand, squeezing hard.
Let go of me, you madwoman, he growled.
Mom, what are you doing? Lily yelled, trying to pull me away.
I shoved Lily aside and kicked Victor in the groin, then elbowed his throat.
Ill record this assault, he shouted, Ill take you both to court.
Hold on, Ill call the police so they can document it properly, I said, pulling out my phone.
The couple fled the tidy twobedroom flat.
Youre not my mother any more, Lily shouted as she left, and youll never see my grandchildren.
What a tragedy, I said dryly, Ill finally have some peace.
I looked at my handsone nail was broken. All loss comes from you lot, I muttered.
After they were gone I washed the kitchen again, threw away the ruined mash and that cursed pan, and changed the locks.
Three months later, as I was walking home from work, Lily approached me, looking gaunt, her cheeks hollow, her eyes tired.
Mum, whats for dinner? she asked.
I dont know yet, I shrugged. What would you like?
Chicken and rice, she whispered, and a bit of salad.
Then lets get the chicken, I said. Youll have to make the salad yourself.
She didnt ask for anything else, and Victor never returned to our lives.
