Im sticking with you, love, the husband begged, eyes wide. I dont know how this happened. Forgive me, please! I swear Ill never talk to her again. Ill change jobs if you want. Shall we leave? Just dont walk out on me
***
September welcomed Emily with a crisp, stillfriendly sun. Yellow leaves swirled around her feet, the smell of damp earth hinted at the coming autumn. She was hurriedly stuffing suitcases. Ahead lay a long trek to the Lake District, where her mother, suddenly taken ill, waited.
At first it looked like a simple cold, but a deep unease settled in Emilys chest and grew each day. The doctors grim diagnosis hit her like a cold shower. Her husband, James, stayed back homehe couldnt accompany his wife. Emily had to make the only sensible choice: grab their son, Oliver, and fly straight to her mum. Thus began their exhausting, raceagainsttime battle.
The first three months blurred into endless doctor visits, lab tests, and frantic hunts for a competent specialist. Whenever a tiny window opened, Emily returned home, only to feel that something had shifted. The house was tidy, the garden neat, James tried to keep the routine alive, but Emilys thoughts were lodged in the Lake District. The home wasnt abandonedJames kept up the cosy ambiencebut Emilys focus had been pulled north.
Just as her mother steadied, Emily had to pack again. Oliver, a bit weary from flights and hospital corridors yet obedient as ever, came along. More planes, more appointments, hopes that flickered like a faulty lightbulb. By March, her mum showed a hint of improvement, granting Emily a brief respite back in her own living room.
It was during this lull that a stubborn truth, like an unwanted weed, pushed its way up. Oliver complained that his phone had taken a dip in the bathtub. Emily recalled a lifehack from a womens magazine: stick the device in a bowl of rice.
***
She fished the smartphone out, switched it on, and the screen lit up with a new message. James was napping peacefully on the sofa.
Oliver, look, your phones working, Emily said, handing him the device.
He lazily scrolled, then froze.
Whats this? Emily leaned in, noticing his sudden stiff posture Im falling for you more and more. What on earth does that mean?
James sat up sharply, trying to appear calm, though his hands trembled a touch.
Sweetheart, youve got it all wrong, he blurted, its just a joke, a colleague of mine was pulling my leg. Were always having a bit of fun
A joke? Emily crossed her arms, feeling an unexpected chill despite the warm flat youre kidding?
Im being honest, its nonsense. We just work together, nothing personal.
Are you sure? Because just colleagues usually dont send that sort of thing, Emily pressed, studying his face for the tiniest lie.
Absolutely sure. Youre overthinking it because of Mums illness. Lets drop it, go for a walk. The suns out, we could use some fresh air.
James was so eager to change the subject that Emily, exhausted from three months of nonstop stress, decided to give in. She blamed it on nerves and fatigue, and they stepped out, but the false calm lasted only briefly.
No sooner had they come back than another message from the same colleague arrived, even more explicit. A sting of jealousy prickled Emily, but she chose to confront James first, avoiding a fullblown scene.
Oliver, look at what she sent now. This isnt a joke.
James snatched the phone, his face paling.
Its a mistake. Ill tell her to stop.
Youll write to her? Or should I? Emilys voice wavered.
Emily, I love only you. Lets not make a drama out of rubbish.
Then came another flight. Another round of mum, doctors, tests, hospital wards. Oliver remained the one constant amid the chaos. Mums condition eased a bit, and Emily finally exhaled, earning another short breather.
***
March rolled around again. Mum felt slightly better, and Emily managed another trip home to try and regain some balance. But balance stayed elusive. A quick glance at a lingering SMS thread that day kept rattling her thoughts; she couldnt simply forget those words.
Emily decided not to wait for another excuse and confronted James directly.
Oliver, I need the truth. I cant live with vague explanations.
Emily, Ive already explained! It was just a clumsy joke. I dont get why youre bringing it up again.
Because it unsettles me, Emily replied firmly.
James tensed.
Emily, why are you making a fuss? Its already messy enough
I spoke to your colleague, Emily said, her tone turning icecold, she reached out herself.
James froze.
She wrote Emily continued, eyes locked on him she wrote, Yes, I love you. Yes, we had something. What do you have to say to that, James?
He was silent, his complexion turning ashen.
Leave, Emilys voice trembled with restrained anger, gather your things and go.
No, he whispered, youre making a huge mistake! I never did anything with her. She made it up, and you believed a lunatic!
I dont believe you! Emily thrust out her phone, flashing the screenshot where the fling confessed everything, look! Your joke!
James hung his head. The silence stretched on forever. When he finally raised his eyes, they were a mix of guilt and desperation.
Fine. I slipped up. I love only you, Emily, always have. Thats the truth.
Slipped up? Emily laughed bitterly, three years of lies! How does one disrespect a person enough to do that?
Its not a lie, I really love you! Its just that you werent around often and I
Not around? Only cowards behave like that! Emily shouted, stepping back, youre a coward!
I didnt leave, Emily, I never abandoned you! he tried to grab her hand, were together
Emily withdrew her hand. Whether he stayed or left no longer mattered; the pain he caused eclipsed everything else.
You didnt abandon me? she asked, bitter, you were torn, but you never left
I couldnt! I love you!
Love? Emily shook her head, no, you stayed because it was convenient, not because you loved me. Im past dissecting your motives. I have to go. Mums getting worse.
Another flight. Another dash to the Lake District, doctors, wards. The battle continued, now bearing both her mothers illness and the weight of Jamess betrayal.
***
Mum passed away in August. By New Years, Emily drifted through days like a sleepwalker, mechanically ticking off chores. The house she once called a fortress now felt foreign. Oliver was her anchor, the only thing keeping her from dissolving into endless grey.
When the first months of despair faded, she snapped back into a sort of awareness, yet never fully recovered. Every glance at James scorched her. She couldnt bear to see his face, hear his voice. Still, she clung to the necessity of caring for Oliver, who seemed to sense her turmoil.
James, finally grasping the depth of his mistake, tried to mend things. He lingered, offered help, begged forgiveness, pleaded for a fresh start.
Emily, please, lets try again. Ive made a terrible error. I know. I never left when you went to Mum. Isnt that proof of my love?
Her mind replayed the SMS snippets shed stumbled upon while clearing her phones cache. The words shed missed in a moment of panic now resurfaced with brutal clarity.
Youre my everything, hed typed to the other woman.
And her reply, etched in Emilys memory:
Did I write that right to your wife? Someone should have nudged her. Any other woman wouldve left, but you youre a rag!
Emily watched Oliver building a tower in the corner, his concentration mirroring her own as a child. He didnt deserve a home riddled with his fathers lies.
James entered with two mugs of tea.
Here, herbal tea. Please, have a sip.
Emily took the mug but didnt drink.
I cant, James
Emily, we agreedtime heals. Give us time. Id do anything to earn your forgiveness.
Time? she managed a bitter smile, time showed youre a master liar. You stayed because leaving got inconvenient, not because Im your love. Her messages prove that. She told you to tell me everything, didnt she?
That was stupid of her! I told her it was over!
You didnt stop her, James. You chose the easiest line to tell me at the moment so I wouldnt crumble.
Emily inhaled deeply.
I cant forgive you. Not now. Maybe never. But I have to live. Oliver has to live. Well stay apart. Ill send him to his aunt for a couple of weeks and stay with a friend while I sort out what I want.
James went pale. He realised this wasnt a pause; it was a genuine chance to lose everything.
Emily, dont do this. Please. Ill see a therapist, any specialist. Ill quit my job if I have to. Just dont go.
Im not walking away from you, James. Im walking away from the lies, Emily whispered, I cant love you now, and I wont live in deceit any longer. Well talk when I return. If I return, of course
***
Emily never did return. Two months apart turned into a final decision: the family would not survive, not even for Olivers sake. James changed jobs, cut ties with his fling. Yet Emily knew that the young woman would forever linger in his and her memory, and she wasnt ready to accept that. Never.
