I still remember how Andrew muttered, My sister wants a small wedding, just the close ones, no strangers, while he stood with his back to me, pretending to rummage through the wardrobe. I watched his shoulders tremble, the way he kept shuffling the same shirts from one peg to another.
You know Mabel, he continued, shes always well, not quite of this world.
Yes, yes, I thought, three years into my marriage to his brother and still feeling like an unwanted guest. As the saying goes, crystal clear
Andrew, I said calmly, lets not play games. Your sister has invited everyoneevery distant uncle you saw only once at your grandmothers funeral, even Aunt Vera, who merely waters your mothers garden when she retreats to the country house. But she didnt invite me. Not your wife. Why?
What do you expect from me? he snapped suddenly. You want me to march over to Mabel and cause a scene? Its her wedding, after all. She can invite whomever she wishes!
And I have a right to know why my husbands family pretends I dont exist! I replied.
Andrews face fell. He sat beside me, slipped his cold, damp fingers around mine, and began to say what I already knew. He spoke of his mothers belief that he could have found someone better than me, of Mabels hurt because I missed her birthday two years agoI was feverish, but who remembers that? He explained that their clan usually celebrates only within a tight circlemother, father, him, and Mabeland any outside intrusion feels like a threat to their cosy world.
What then? I asked once he finished. Should I spend my whole life waiting for his family to finally accept me?
Not my whole life, he tried to smile, perhaps five years
Just five? I laughed. I thought Id be waiting fifty.
He smiled sheepishly and looked away.
Listen, Andrew, I said, squeezing his hand, heres the deal. Either we go to your sisters wedding together, or you stay home.
Christine?
Yes, Andrew, exactly, I said seriously, meeting his eyes. Did you understand?
He nodded hastily, like a schoolboy, promising to speak with Mabel, to sort everything out. Promise after promise
The two weeks leading up to the wedding were a strange tangle of tension. Andrew pretended everything was fine, but I saw his nervesnailbiting, a habit hed never had before, delayed replies, and long, lingering moments in the bathroom with his phone.
One day I stumbled upon a text exchange with Mabel; he hadnt said a word to her.
Fine, I thought.
Three days before the wedding I bought a dressa beautiful, pricey gown the shade of a seafoam tide, the kind that cannot be ignored. When Andrew saw it hanging on the rack, he turned to me, surprised.
Why? he asked.
Because were going to Mabels wedding, I replied with a sweet smile. Youve sorted everything, havent you? As we agreed?
He fell silent, then tried to steer the conversation elsewhere.
Fine I muttered to myself, irritated but already knowing exactly what I would do.
On the morning of the wedding I rose early, laid out breakfast, set the table, and even placed fresh flowers. Earlier that week Mabel had given me a bunch of white roses, perhaps an attempt to mend his looming guilt. I sipped my coffee as Andrew shuffled into the kitchen, his eyes lighting up at the sight of me in a robe, hair loose, scrolling on my phone.
You uh youre not planning to go? he asked cautiously.
And you? I replied calmly.
He tensed, realizing Id set a trap, but halfasleep he could not work out his next move.
Sit down, breakfast is getting cold, I urged.
He dropped into the chair opposite me and began, Christine, listen Ive been thinking, maybe its better if I go alone? Just to tick the box. Ill appear at the ceremony and head straight back. You know its my sister; I cant simply skip it
I finished my coffee and set the cup down gently.
Of course you cant, I said, my voice as warm as possible. Its your sister, after all. Get ready, or youll be late.
He planted a quick kiss on my cheek, bolted to the shower, then raced around the flat searching for cufflinks, a tie, shoesevery little detail.
I watched his frantic ballet with an amused smile. When he finally stood, fully dressed, at the doorway, I whispered, Do me a favourleave the keys on the hall table.
What? he asked, bewildered.
The flats keys. Leave them there. You can collect your things later. Dont worry, Ill gather them. My tone stayed gentle.
A sudden hush fell over the house, as if even the old clock on the mantel had stopped ticking. Andrew stood in the doorway, handsome and festive, yet utterly lost.
Christine he began, his voice pleading. Youre not serious
I am completely serious, I said. Youve made your choice, Andrew, and Ive accepted it. Go to your sisters wedding, have a good time, but do not return.
But thats absurd! he protested. Because of a wedding you want me to
It isnt the wedding, I answered, its that you never tried to do anything for me. You pretended youd sorted things, hoping Id back out at the last minutejust like always.
Christine, stop he smiled weakly. Why are you making a mountain out of a molehill? Youve never been a drama queen.
Andrew, I said, do you truly not understand, or are you just playing dumb? Your family never accepts me! Year after year they make it clear Im an extra in their little troupe. And you have you done anything to change that?
He stammered, I I talked with Mother
So what did you say? Will you accept my wife, honestly and truly?
Christine he tried to approach, but I stepped back.
You promised to speak with Mabel, to resolve it. Yet you never did, did you?
He blushed, eyes dropping.
Go on, Andrew, give my regards to Mabel, I said.
Do you want me to stay? he asked, his last attempt.
And do you want to stay with me? I pressed. Can you defy your family and skip the celebration? When the flood of calls comes, will you say youre coming only with me?
After a heartbeat he answered, Well its inconvenient.
Then go, if its inconvenient. And do not come back to my flat, I said firmly. This is my home, and I have the right to ask you out. You value your parents and sister more than your wife. So why should we keep living together?
