The Longing for Freedom
“Mum, someones knocking at the door! Can you get it? Our hands are full,” called the children.
“Of course,” Natalie replied with a quiet smile.
She opened the door without even checking the peephole. On Christmas Eve, it was always kids carolling, so she expected to see another young boy or girl on the doorstep.
But when she swung the door open, she froze in shock. Standing there was David, her ex-husband, looking at her like a kicked dog. At his feet lay a duffel bag, probably stuffed with his things.
“Natalie,” she managed, her voice hoarse, “what are you doing here?”
David grinned, far too cheerfully, then ducked his head slightly, staring at his shoes. “Hello, love. I missed you all so much. Thought Id spend the holidays with my family.”
He moved to step inside, but she stopped him with a raised hand. “David, I didnt invite you in.”
“Here we go. Nat, Im back. Isnt this what you wanted? Here I am!” He spread his arms wide.
“Back? Just like that? Have you forgotten the last year and a half?”
David scowled, and Natalie remembered how her heart had shatteredinto tiny, irreparable pieces.
Fifteen years ago, theyd married. A young couple, they moved into a rented flat, living in harmony, as they say, like two peas in a pod. Both worked, so money wasnt an issue. A year later, twinsJack and Ethanwere born. The boys were lively and mischievous, exhausting Natalie, but she never complained. She adored them.
Thirteen years flew by. The lads grew taller, nearly her height, but remained her cheeky little rascals. David, though, changed. He worked late, travelled often, claiming busy projects. She chalked it up to his demanding job.
Then, one day, shopping at Tesco, she spotted him in the spirits aislesupposedly away on business. Before she could call out, a young woman kissed his cheek and dropped something into his basket.
Natalie held her breath, hiding behind a display. David didnt hesitatewrapping an arm around the womans waist, whispering in her ear. She laughed, hanging off his neck as they headed to checkout. Then they drove off in his car.
Natalie stood, pain searing through her. Her life had just derailed. Yet, clinging to false hope, she called him.
“Hi, love. Hows the trip?” she asked, masking her turmoil.
“Oh, Nat, hi. Swamped with workIll call later.”
She finished shopping, went home, and mechanically cooked dinner, helped the boys with homework, tucked them in. Then she stared at her phone, whispering, “You promised to call”
A week passed in silence. She waited, restless, but didnt call again. Finally, she made a decision.
The day before Davids return, she sent the boys to her mothers. Thered be a row, and they didnt need to witness it.
When David walked in, she sat at the kitchen table. He called out playfully from the bedroom, “No welcome home? Doesnt anyone love their old dad anymore?”
Natalie cut in coldly, “Who is she, David?”
He stiffened. “Who? Nat, what are you on about?”
“I saw you at Tesco last week. Who is she?”
He slumped into a chair. “Chloe. A colleague.”
“How long?”
“A year. But Nat, youve got to understandhomes chaos. The boys are loud, needy. You only think about them. Im alone. Youre my wife, and”
“Im their mother first! They need me. Youre a grown manyou know they need care.” Her voice trembled, but she wouldnt break. Not now.
“But Im bored. Life with you is dull! I needed fun. Chloe understands me. She doesnt nag.”
“Nag? What did I ever ask for? The odd chore?”
“You? Fix this, clean that. Im in my prime! I need someone who gets me. Youre just a housewife now. I dont love you anymore.” He froze, realising what hed said.
“Fine. Suppose youre tired of me. What about the boys?”
“Theyll cope. Alimony, weekend visits. But I want freedomno more of this.” He gestured around the kitchen.
“For them, itll be hell. Stay, David. For their sake.”
“Dont you get it? Im done! I want a life with Chloe, not you. Im leaving.”
Numb, she watched him pack a duffel bag and walk out.
Now, seeing that same bag, Natalie almost laughed. He had no idea what the last eighteen months had been like. The boys had tried calling, searching for him. Hed cut them off. His alimony payments were a jokehis “official” salary barely covered expenses. Shed taken extra shifts to make ends meet, but shed managed.
“You said we were boring,” she said flatly.
David brightened, stepping forward, but she blocked him.
“I was wrong, darling. Forgive me.” He reached for her hand, but she pulled away. “You were my rock. Chloe was just a fling.”
Noise from the hallJack peered out. “Whos here, Mum?”
She turned, silent.
“Dad?” Ethan joined him.
“Lads! Im back. Brought presentslets spend Christmas together! Come here!”
He nearly crossed the threshold when a firm hand gripped his shoulder.
“Maybe another time, eh? Christmas is for family, right boys?” Natalie smiled as she spotted himher Kevin. The tall, steady man didnt raise his voice, but David shrank back. The twins rushed past to hug Uncle Kev.
Kevin glanced at Natalie. “Should I stay?”
She shook her head, smiling.
He herded the boys to the dining room, where the table needed setting. Theyd already forgotten their father.
David finally found his voice. “So thats it. Traded me for some brute, did you?”
“Not traded. Chose him when I was free. No ring on my finger then.” She waved her hand, the wedding band glinting.
“Oh, I see! You begged me to come back, cried your eyes out Traitor!”
“I wanted youeighteen months ago, David. Now Ive moved on. Merry Christmas.”
She shut the door, locked it, took a deep breath, and walked into the warm, bright flatwhere her sons and her husband waited.
