**Diary Entry**
She only wanted to see the woman hed left her for…
Parsheen walked straight into the kitchen, still in his coat, and sat at the table.
*Ive fallen for someone else. Shes carrying my child. Im leaving you.* No preamble, just the cold truth.
Vita turned off the tap and faced him.
*The girl who sells apples at the market? Tonya, isnt it?* Her voice was eerily calm.
*You knew?* His eyes flicked up, startled.
*Darling, youre a terrible liar. Of course I knew. Tell medo you love her, or are you leaving because of the baby?*
*Im sorry.* He dropped his gaze.
*Ten years together, and they meant nothing? What about me?* Her eyes screamed the words, but Vita stayed silent.
*Are you planning to marry her?* she asked.
*Not now.*
*Then at the university, we act as we always have. I wont have people whispering behind my back.*
*Agreed. Should I go?* He stood.
Vita turned back to the sink, letting the water drown out his footsteps as he left.
He packed quicklyjust the essentials. Maybe hed return?
She shut off the tap, sank into the chair hed just vacated, and rested her forehead on folded arms. But she didnt cry.
***
She hadnt cried a month ago either, when her friend Sarah mentioned seeing Parsheen with another woman.
*A student? Vita had asked. Theyre always falling for him. What do they even see in him?*
*No, this ones a market girl. Tonya. From the countryside, lives in a bedsit on Victoria Street. Twenty-three.* Sarah delivered the details like a detective in an old spy film.
*How do you even know all this?*
*Small town. My friend Lizzie lives in that house. Remember her? Same year as us at uni. Your Parsheens there often.*
*So thats where he goesnot extra tutorials. *
Seeing was believing. The next day, Vita followed him. She waited by the columns in the university hall, timing it perfectly.
When he left, she shadowed him at a distance, careful not to stare. She wasnt some jealous wife stalking her husbandshe just needed to see the woman whod replaced her.
He stopped near the market stall where the girl sold apples and pears. A short queue had formed. Tonya, sleeves rolled up over a fleece, weighed fruit with quick hands. When she bent to the crates, her thick braid swung forward, loose strands clinging to her face. She blew them away, cheeks dimpling as she smiled. She served customers patiently but kept flashing Parsheen sly glances. *Probably shortchanging them. Should I report her?* Vita thought bitterly.
An old woman meticulously inspected each apple before dropping it into Tonyas bag.
*Enough,* the woman finally said.
*Take some plums too. Sweet and softperfect for jam.*
The woman hesitated, squeezed a few, then shook her head.
Tonya barely charged her. *Pitying pensioners? Clever,* Vita thought. *Either rotten stock or a show for Parsheen.*
Shed passed this stall daily, never noticing the girl. Yet Parsheen had.
Once the queue cleared, he approached. The way Tonya looked at himlike he hung the moon. *Of course, to her, hes a catch. Almost a professor.* She brushed invisible dust from his shoulders, that tender gesture stabbing Vita deeper than any affair. Shed assumed a flingthis was love.
Vita couldnt see his face but knew his expression mirrored Tonyas. She walked away before they noticed her.
That night, alone, she finally wept.
***
Shed noticed him early at uniquiet, brooding, aloof. Handsome, if not for the permanent scowl. A mystery. Hed reminded her of Heathcliff.
One lecture, she slid into the seat beside him.
*Bored?*
Hed smiled then, the frown vanishing. *Hes beautiful,* she realized. Soon, they were inseparable.
*What do you even see in him?* Sarah had grumbled.
*Best you dont know, or youd steal him,* Vita teased.
Their romance unfolded slowly, but by graduation, they married. His parents were gonea car crash years priorexplaining his guarded nature.
In bed, he was gentle. Afterward, hed recite Keats, Auden, Eliot. He read beautifully, his voice weaving through her soul.
Vita longed for a child, but doctors said it was unlikely after a childhood accident on the ice. Ten years passedno miracle. Parsheen insisted they could adopt, but Vita wanted her own.
After uni, they both lectured at the same department. Lately, their marriage had settled into comfortable friendship.
But Parsheen craved passionand a child. So hed found Tonya: uncomplicated, fertile, *the picture of health,* as they say.
When Vita learned of the baby, jealousy strucknot over the affair, but the child. *Hell have a son or daughter, and Ill never know motherhood.*
If she couldnt give him a child, perhaps it was right to step aside. What use was a clever, barren wife?
At work, they maintained appearances, walking home separately with invented excuses. No one questioned it.
Parsheen moved into Tonyas bedsit. Vita hoped hed return, but weeks passed. She avoided looking toward the market.
Then, between lectures, he whispered, glowing: *A daughter. Allie.* She forced congratulations.
That evening, he came to her, shattered. *Tonyas gone. A stroke.* Vita held him as he sobbed.
*The baby?*
*Im keeping her.*
*And work?*
*My aunt will help. Ill go part-time.*
By spring, his aunt left*gardening season*and the hired nanny proved useless. Desperate, he called Vita.
*You left me. Now you want my help?*
*Please.*
Resentment warred with pity. But when she held Allie, love erased everything.
Neighbors soon complained about a man and child in a dead womans flat.
*Pack your things. Youre both coming home,* Vita said.
They slept apart at first. Then Allie said *Mummy,* and Vitas heart swelled.
One evening, she returned to laughterAllie toddling, Parsheen catching her, both radiant. Shed never heard him laugh like that.
*Look!* He set Allie down, and she wobbled to him. That night, they became husband and wife again. As he recited poetry, her heart soared.
*Did you read to her too?* she ventured.
*Once. She didnt understand,* he admitted after a pause.
Allie grew, favouring Tonya. One day, Vita and Parsheen passed the market. A different womanolder, brassy-hairednow hawked fruit, flirting lazily.
*Lets go,* he muttered, disgusted.
That night, he hugged Vita at the sink. *Thank you. Without you I adore you both.*
*Without you and Tonya, thered be no Allie.*
Shed forgiven. Had she refused, her life wouldve been emptyno Allie, no second chance.
Vita pitied Tonya, gone too soon. But shed left Allie. One day, theyd tell her about her birth mother. Or perhaps not. Vita was her mother in every way that mattered.
**Lesson:** Sometimes love means letting go of pride to hold onto what truly matters.
