Hey love, guess whats been driving me round the bend lately? So, Im coming home from work, looking forward to a proper dinner, a bit of a unwind and a catchup with you, and instead Im stuck babysitting my niece again.
Is she even really yours? Mark asked, halfraging as he flung his jacket onto the back of his chair. I should be feeding my nephew in something decent, not in a stainsplattered shirt from baby puree.
She’s not exactly a stranger, I sighed, curling up a little. Honestly, I dont enjoy it either, but Claire begged me. Shes got a manicure appointment and cant take the little one with her.
Mark unbuttoned his coat, muttering about needing to change into something more comfortable. I get it, but you cant go on nailpolishing without clean hands, can you? Are you the only one in the family who can juggle all this?
I started rummaging for the spaghetti, and he cut in, So youre the one who can do everything except look after yourself. He looked angry at first, then his expression softened. He knows Im not his enemy Im just a bit of a pushover, thats all.
You know, if you dont pull her off your back, shell keep riding you forever, and youll end up taking the blame, Mark warned. The one who drives the car ends up paying for the petrol, right?
I pretended to be engrossed in the kitchen, but deep down I knew he was right. I didnt want to be a second mother to my nephew, nor did I want to argue with the family.
It all started innocently enough.
Emily, Im feeling rubbish and Ive got little Tommy on my hands. I need to pop to the chemist but I cant leave him alone. Could you help? Claire pleaded. I didnt even think about ordering a delivery; I just dropped everything and ran.
From then on it was nonstop. Need the phone fixed? Claire calls. Out of groceries? Im on it. A parcel arrives at the pickup point? Im sprinting like a courier.
I could manage it because I work from home on a flexible schedule, but that doesnt mean its convenient. Claires flat is a fifteenminute walk away, and if you add the roundtrip, the queue at the shop and all the little errands, its at least an hour each time.
These days Im mostly working evenings and sometimes nights when the house is quiet. Mark isnt thrilled, and honestly Im not either. I tried to talk to Claire.
Claire, whats going on with Ben? He never helps you? I asked, handing over another parcel from the courier.
He does, but hes always exhausted from work. Hell watch the kid for a bit while I dash to the shower, then everything else falls on me.
Claire looks after her own husband, but never thinks about anyone elses. I swallowed a sigh and fell quiet for a moment.
And his mum? She lives nearby, doesnt she? I nudged.
Dont even mention her! Claire rolled her eyes. I dont want anything to do with that old bore. Shes a walking encyclopedia of unwanted advice. Id rather starve than ask her for anything.
Is there really no one else? I pressed. Lucys kid is about the same age as yours. Maybe you both could swap watches, or Sarah could help she doesnt work anyway.
It feels odd to lean on other people, Claire admitted. Theyre not obliged to help.
Our own people are always handy, I thought, sighing.
I decided Id try to say no. Even without Marks hint, I knew something was off.
The chance came the next day. Claire rang, her voice bright. Emily, Ive booked a slot at the salon. Can you mind the kid for an hour?
Her tone was more a command than a request. I was fed up. Why should I rearrange my whole day just so she can get a polish?
No, Claire, I cant today. Sorry.
What do you mean you cant? she snapped.
I cant solve all your problems. I have my own life too.
I get it, but what am I supposed to do? Ive got no one else. I cant ditch the appointment shell think Ive let her down.
You didnt even ask me before booking, I shot back. Im not your personal assistant or a nanny. Sort it out yourself.
She pouted, Fine, its easy for you to say you dont have kids.
She knew my nephew was practically becoming my son, but I stayed silent. Conflict isnt my style, and even this refusal felt like a feat.
Claire didnt give up. She brought Mum into it.
Mum, how can you be so selfish? Shes my sister, shes got a baby, and youre turning her down!
Mum, when she asked me for medicine I went, because she was ill. But now shes calling every other day about trivial stuff… today she even wants me to go to the salon for her!
Its because she wants to look pretty, Mum said. Put yourself in her shoes.
I raised an eyebrow. No one ever put themselves in my shoes.
Mum, if youre so wise, why dont you help her?
I? I can barely get out of bed! Youre the young one, its easier for you.
I was fed up with hearing young, childless, just sit at home. That day I finally drew a line. They gave me the silent treatment for a whole week, acting as if I didnt exist. Anyone else might have breathed a sigh of relief, but I felt stuck, trying to figure out how to patch things up.
So when Claire called again a week later, begging me to watch the kid while she got her nails, I gave in. I hated myself for it, but I slipped back into the unpaidnanny role. It seemed there were only two options: become the outcast of my own family or endure it.
Youre too soft, Emily, you keep giving in, Mark warned after hearing the story. You need to set boundaries, or shell never learn to stand on her own.
I sighed and nodded, staying up late thinking of a way to say no without sounding harsh.
Sure enough, the phone rang in the middle of the night.
Emily, I cant cope the baby has a fever, wont stop crying, and Im running in circles! Come over, well manage together.
I cant, I have work. Were locked into a system that tracks every minute on the computer, even lunch breaks. Its like being in an office all day.
There was a pause. Claire seemed to be looking for a weak spot.
Please, just once, last time! Ask someone to cover for you, or take a day off.
She didnt get it. I had no choice. I pretended to concede.
Fine Ill think of something.
I hung up and texted Ben for his mothers number, saying his wife needed urgent help. Ben didnt hesitate, and his mum was on her way in no time, bombarding me with updates.
Youve gone mad! Claire texted, Why did you call her on me?
I needed help, thats why, I replied coolly. I cant be there myself, you know that.
She read it and stayed quiet. I felt a tiny victory. Maybe not a war, but Id won this little battle. Claire will still be a handful, Mum might still be grumbling, but now the sister will have to sort things out herself or learn to lean on those who actually want to help.
