17October2025
Dear Diary,
Tonight I found myself at a little tearoom on a rainy High Street, trying to sort out the mess thats been brewing at home. I was sitting across from my sixyearold daughter, Ellie, stirring the lukewarm tea in a dainty white mug with a tiny spoon. The plate of icecream in front of herbright coloured scoops under a leaf of mint and a cherry, all drizzled in chocolatemight have tempted any child, but Ellie barely glanced at it. She’d been determined since last Friday to have a serious chat with me.
I kept my mouth shut for a long while, then finally asked, What do you think we should do, Ellie? Stop seeing each other altogether? How am I to live then?
Ellie wrinkled her tiny nosejust like Mums, a little potatoshaped puffand answered after a moments thought, No, Dad. I cant manage without you either. How about this: you call Mum and tell her youll pick me up from nursery every Friday. Then we can go for a walk, or if you fancy a cuppa or some icecream, we can stay in the tearoom. Ill tell you everything about how Mum and I get on.
She paused, then added, And if you ever want to see how Mums doing, Ill film her on my phone each week and show you the clips. Does that sound OK?
I gave her a small smile, nodded, and said, Alright, lets try that.
A sigh of relief escaped Ellies lips and she finally dug into her icecream. Yet she wasnt finished. She lifted a coloured sugar strand that had settled on her upper lip, licked it, and grew serious, almost adultlike. She thought of her old manmy birthday had been just the week before, and shed drawn a big 28 on a card at nursery, painstakingly colouring each digit.
Her face hardened, eyebrows knitting together, and she said, I think you should get married soon. She added, with a generous lie, Youre not that old yet, are you?
I chuckled at her wellmeaning suggestion. Youll say Im not that old, wont you?
Ellies enthusiasm surged. Exactly! Not too old, not too old! Look, Uncle Sergei, whos been popping over to Mum twice already, is almost bald, you know She smoothed her soft curls with a tiny hand and stared straight at me, as if shed just spilled Mums secret. Both of us pressed our palms to our mouths, eyes wide, mimicking shock.
I raised my voice a bit, Uncle Sergei? What on earth is this Uncle Sergei you speak of? Is he Mums boss?
Ellie stammered, I dont know maybe hes the boss. He brings us sweets, cake, sometimes flowers for Mum.
I clasped my hands on the table, looking at them as if weighing a decision that would shape my life. Ellie sensed that I was on the brink of something important, and she didnt push me. She seemed to understand that men often need a nudge, especially from the women they cherish most.
Silence stretched. Finally, I let out a breath, uncrossed my fingers, lifted my head and said, Lets go, love. Its getting late; Ill take you home and have a word with Mum.
Ellie didnt ask what that talk would be about; she just kept eating her icecream. When I finally announced I was heading home, she flung her spoon onto the table, slid off the chair, wiped the crumbs from her lip with the back of her hand, and, looking straight at me, declared, Im ready. Lets go.
We hurried out of the tearoomwell, I ran, holding Ellies hand tightly, like a banner caught in a gust of wind. As we burst into the stairwell, the lift doors creaked shut behind us, taking a neighbour up to the third floor. I glanced bewildered at Ellie, who stared up at me with fierce resolve and asked, So? Who are we waiting for? The seventh floor is the top, you know.
I scooped her up and sprinted up the stairs. When Mum finally flung the front door open, I launched straight into it: You cant do that! Whos this Sergei? I love you, and we have Ellie I wrapped Mum into my embrace, then pulled Ellie close, feeling the tangled warmth of the three of us. Ellie clutched both of our necks, eyes squeezed shut, as if the world could melt away in a single adult kiss.
Looking back, I realise that trying to keep the peace while juggling love, duty, and a spirited child is a delicate dance. Tonight taught me that honesty, even when it comes wrapped in a childs blunt suggestion, is the only way to steer a family through stormy weather.
Lesson: Speak plainly, listen closely, and let love guide the compromises.
