Emma! Em, shouted Oliver as he crossed the road.
I let out a heavy sigh, set my grocery bags down on the curb and paused. Across the street I saw the car that used to be my husbands, sucked my cheeks in, and lowered my head. How tired I am of all this. Oliver hurried toward me, nearly stumbling, eager to help.
Hey, Em, he said, taking the bags.
Hello, I replied.
I was just driving past, saw you struggling with those heavy bags and thought Id lend a hand, he said with a foolish grin. Come on.
How can that be just passing by? You live out in Bromley, and this is the outskirts of town
Oliver turned toward his car, two bags in his hands.
My friend gave me a lift from work, and then I saw you couldt just drive past. Ill give you a lift home.
Its only about 500metres, I said.
No problem, Ill carry the heavy bags. Hows Archie, Mum?
Soon youll pick him up on the weekend and find out everything. You two talk every day, dont you? Why do you keep asking about me?
Im just interested, Oliver said, opening the passenger door for his former wife. Were not strangers, after all.
Ill sit in the back.
Theres a mess in there, dont.
I opened the rear door, glanced at the cluttered interiorindeed, there was a lot of stuff.
You still dont believe me I muttered, thinking of the photos Id found online.
I sighed and settled into the front seat instead. Oliver stowed the bags in the boot. He smiled warmly at me as we pulled away, and I stared out the window at the familiar neighbourhood.
You look good, as always, he said.
Oliver, just get me home. I still have dinner to make, I snapped.
Right, he revved the engine, and we were off. Ive started a new job, sorting out paperwork for a night shift, he babbled, while I kept my gaze fixed on the passing streets. Did Archie say you moved out of your motherinlaws place?
Its been three years, shes nothing to me now, I replied without moving.
Emma, stop playing hideandseek! Why am I always the one who has to pick up our son from her? Are you hiding your address? Let me take you home.
No, thanks, I muttered, rubbing my jackets edge. I bought groceries for Mum.
Give them back and Ill drive you home, Archie had said
We stopped in a courtyard.
What did Archie say? I told him not to. Are you two still on good terms?
Yes, I said.
What the devil do you want from me? I finally let loose.
Emma, were not strangers we have a son, he tried to grab my hand. I pulled it back into my pocket with obvious disdain.
Oliver, enough! How many accidental visits can I endure? Stop calling my mother and begging for forgivenessit wont help! We moved out because I was fed up with you! Im on the brink of a nervous breakdown, everyone keeps saying how sorry you are, how you miss us, how you want the family back.
And Archie? Why are you pushing him? Hes just getting used to his dad on weekends, and you keep telling him well reconcile, asking me for updates, asking when I get home from work, where I am.
Im worried, Oliver said.
Im worried too about our son! How many times can you keep feeding him these ideas? Stop using him to pressure me!
I got out of the car, slammed the door, and tried to pull the bags from the boot, but the lock was jammed. I tugged at the lid, frustrated, desperate to be rid of Oliver. My mother watched us from the upstairs window; I could feel her lingering gaze through the blinds. Oliver finally opened the boot, carried the bags to the doorstep, but I stopped him sharply.
No, Ill do it myself, I told him.
Emma, you have to understandI still love you! Id give up everything for you and Archie. Should I quit the night shift? Return to my old job? Get you a car? Why are we walking? It would be easier for you and Archie to pick him up from karate.
No, I snapped, snatching the bags from his hands. Id actually love for you to go somewhere farfind a woman you truly love, live happily, and leave me alone.
Emma, forgive me; it was a oneoff, she meant nothing to me! I still curse myself, he pleaded.
I forgave you long ago, and I let you go, but you wont let me go.
I cant! Living without you feels unbearable, he shouted as I climbed the stairs.
Oliver, stop putting on these dramas, I replied. Ive forgiven you, but I cant love you again or live with you.
The door on the second floor slammed shut and everything fell silent. Oliver clenched his fists, walked back to his car, and stared at the windows of the house where his former motherinlaw lived. What a fool he was, swapping his wife, son, and family for a fleeting flingwell, maybe more than one, but at least hed only been caught in one. After the divorce, after a year alone, he finally realised there was no one better than his Emma and Archie, his little bear.
Wed met back in school; shed transferred into our Year10 class and eclipsed every other girl. Oliver only had eyes for her; everyone else faded. Summer holidays came, his fickle heart cooled, and he spent the season at his grandmothers, where he met another girl who outshone the sun at noon.
When he returned on the first of September, Emma no longer stirred his heart. They stayed friends, hanging out in the same circle. Years later, after both went to university, they reunited in that same group, now older. Emma earned a firstclass degree, landed her first job, and returned to her hometown, taking a post where her mother worked. Oliver, meanwhile, chased his own ventures, never quite finding his footing, eventually taking a job at a factoryseemed settled, but his ambitions kept nagging at him.
Everything changed when Emma told him, after a few meetings, that she was pregnant.
Oliver was scared but didnt panic; he gathered Emma in his arms and introduced her to his parents. They married, Archie was born, they bought a house with a mortgage that the grandparents helped pay off early. Every summer we went to the sea, celebrated birthdays, christenings, weekend trips, and family anniversaries. Oliver began to feel restless. Emma, on the other hand, sank deeper into domestic bliss, caring for the little boy. Arguments and joys came and went, but nothing catastrophic. The motherinlaw adored her grandson; the fatherinlaw respected Oliver.
Archie grew, Emma returned to work. Oliver suddenly craved recognition at work, tired of routine, but after stumbling over a long, winding career ladder he found himself stuck on the fifth or sixth rung, realizing his zeal would never be fulfilled. New friends came, he switched jobs, but never found his place. Then a former colleague from his first job reappeared, offering him a departmenthead role in exchange for well, some intimate favours. She left soon after, and Oliver was left lonely again.
Emma saw this differently. She decided that Oliver was burnt out, his crisis, his holiday didnt line up with hers; she urged him to take some time off, even suggested he take Archie with him. He didnt want to be away from them, but eventually agreed to visit a friend in Ashford for a few days of fishingthough they never even got to the lake. The friends wife sent a few pictures of a pleasant evening, asking them not to bother the husband any more.
Emma packed her things, her son, and went to stay with her mother.
When Oliver asked where she was after receiving some crude photos from her fishing trip, he raced to her door, only to find it shut tight, her mothers stare burning through the curtains. He decided to give Emma some space, but then a divorce petition arrived. He fought the process, tried to win Emmas forgiveness wherever he could, but she eventually signed the papers.
A year later, watching Oliver try hardpaying child support, calling Archie every weekend, even winning over his motherinlaw againhis mother kept urging Emma to forgive him. She finally did, and Oliver returned to the family, but the old feelings, the trust, were gone. Emmas wounds had scarred over, leaving only cold memories.
We finally went our separate ways.
Mum, why are you bothering him? my mother asked as she entered the kitchen, barely hearing someone else.
Whos bothering who? I answered. Has Archie not turned up from school yet?
No.
Hes driving me mad, Mum! I wish hed be off on a night shift somewhere else! He stalks me; Im scared to start any relationship, never knowing what Oliver will do.
I walked in with the grocery bags; Mum had already made a pot of tea, the house smelling of fresh scones.
Blimey, it smells lovely, I said.
Emma, you cant keep doing this. You have a son. Youve lived together for years
How could I? Mum? How could we share a bed, a flat? If hes a stranger now, if the spark died between us how do you live with someone you no longer love?
Then why give him hope, why keep in touch? Mum unpacked the purchases, avoiding my eyes. Weve talked about this before.
Its him! He wont give me a break. He jumped on our IT guy a month ago, right outside the office. I smiled, flirted a bit. He wants forgiveness What am I supposed to forgive? I never even…
He wont let me go, I need someone else, I said, halflaughing. Whats the point of a marriage when its just a habit?
Dont let him hold you back, Mum said calmly. Men like Oliver cant handle betrayal.
What? Which betrayal? Weve been divorced for three years, hes nothing to me.
He cant release you.
Exactly, hes a pest!
Oliver kept pressing until his new job paperwork was done. He lingered at my office during lunch, called Archie, asked him to tell his mum wed still be together. My former motherinlaw stopped answering. A few weeks later, I met Oliver at the school gates early in the morning.
Emma, Im leaving
Good luck.
Archie, dads going far but not for long, Oliver said, looking at me. Got nothing to say? he asked. Archie tugged my sleeve; his first lesson was Russian, and he couldnt be late.
Ive said everything. Happy youre changing scenery, hope it improves your life.
Dont hope, I wont abandon you!
Oliver sat with his son, hugged him tightly, tried to do the same with me, but I stepped back. He clenched his teeth and walked to his car.
Ill forgive you, Emma, he shouted from the roadside, but betrayal never leaves.
It amused me; hed think Id forgive him lovely, thanks.
Three months of peace passed. I didnt flinch when I saw a blue car parked down the street. I moved around the city freely, unafraid of a random runin with my ex. I went to a café with colleagues a couple of times, finally met an old friend. She pushed me to save my marriage, to love Oliver, but I cut her off, convinced he was manipulating me. Turns out shed also been divorced, knowing what it was like to raise a child alone, repeatedly forgiving her own husbands little sinsshed even found a hidden lipstick in the boot of his car, and later a new woman moved in, boasting about a fresh start with a man named Chris.
Can we safely pop a bottle of champagne? Claire smiled, and open our hearts to new love? she winked.
Sure, if you dont mind a hundred texts and calls from Oliver every day, I muttered, scanning the menu.
Make it happen! Get out, talk to someone, youre young, you look stunning, look, she whispered, leaning over the table to point discreetly to a handsome stranger. Hes only eyeing you.
He swaggered over, introduced himself, offered coffee. We declined, but the charming man lingered.
Claire kept watching him, then suddenly needed to leave. Thats how I met Simon, we chatted, swapped numbers, and started texting. I stopped reading Olivers endless messages; my phone kept buzzing, and I smiled at each new text. I hurried home from work, as if someone were waiting.
Hello, Archie, hows it going?
All good, Dad, I got a five on my English test! Guess what
Archie, hows Mum? I interrupted the kids excitement.
Fine, shes changed her hair, we were at Lilas birthday yesterday
Nice. She never answers my calls, doesnt read my messages, I said, trying to sound caring. Ask her to pick up the phone, please.
Mum cant right now, we have guests.
Who?
My Uncle Simon.
What the hell, Uncle?! Hand over the phone quickly.
Mom! Mom! Archie shouted from his room. In the kitchen there was laughter, the smell of something delicious, and muffled thumps from the next room. Uncle Simon was fiddling with something again. Mum! Archie cried louder, Dads calling.
Mum entered, smiling, adjusting her apron, glancing toward the kitchen light.
Whats up, love? Youre out the door already? Throwing yourself at men again? Oliver joked dryly.
And you? Still feeling well? I replied, dryly. Why are you calling?
Youve got a son! How dare you! he roared. Ill come over, give you a honeymoon youll never forget, you wretch.
Finally youve cracked, I laughed. Been waiting for the day the real man who swapped his family for a fling shows up. When you realise were nothing to each other
Dammit! Oliver shouted into the phone, Ill be back in a week, I I
Mum, I did what you asked, a male voice said nearby, Are you coming? Archie and I want a treat, the smell from the oven is killing us. Right, Archie?
The boy nodded, reaching for his phone, his voice a scream.
Whos that? Simon asked, Let me, he offered, handing the phone.
I gave it to him; the shouting stopped as Oliver hung up.
Dad will call later, I told Archie, glancing at the worried boy.
Oliver never called Archie again, but he kept ringing his former motherinlaw, insulting her, even texting Claire, promising to return and something about breaking a leg. He never came back from the first deployment, stayed on the second, then vanished somewhere across the country, chasing his own ambitions. He thought of Archie only twice a year, on birthdays and New Years, never writing to his son or exwife, blaming both for the failed family. Archie turned out to be a traitor, siding with Simon
And I? I live with Simon now; hes no longer a guest in my flat. Archie spent some time upset that his dad didnt call, but Simon and I found plenty in commonhe also had a strict teacher at school, remembered most of the rules by heart, and happily explained them to Archie.
